March 18th, 2018
Why Guilt And Flagellation Do Not Work
Beating ourselves up most often results in the opposite outcome from what we want to achieve and what we were beating ourselves up about in the first place.
Being self-compassionate to ourselves when we make mistakes is not and "excuse" and does not let us off the hook.
Rather, it allows us to objectively own our actions and words without over-the-top self-condemnation and unrealistic vows to be perfect in the future. It allows us examine and understand the numerous causes and conditions that lead us to act the way we do. It gives us the humility to admit to ourselves that we are human and we are flawed. It enables us to see ourselves more clearly and accurately so that we can do what is needed to make things better as well as make possible changes moving forward.
In a similar vein, tempering guilt allows us to get more done.
Neutralizing perfectionism mitigates paralysis and procrastination.
Actively deciding not to panic and overcompensate allows us to step into a place of peace in the midst of chaos and confusion.
Ultimately, the man who is whipped (whether physically or by the words he tells himself/ lets himself believe) is left weaker, not stronger.
Why Guilt And Flagellation Do Not Work
Beating ourselves up most often results in the opposite outcome from what we want to achieve and what we were beating ourselves up about in the first place.
Being self-compassionate to ourselves when we make mistakes is not and "excuse" and does not let us off the hook.
Rather, it allows us to objectively own our actions and words without over-the-top self-condemnation and unrealistic vows to be perfect in the future. It allows us examine and understand the numerous causes and conditions that lead us to act the way we do. It gives us the humility to admit to ourselves that we are human and we are flawed. It enables us to see ourselves more clearly and accurately so that we can do what is needed to make things better as well as make possible changes moving forward.
In a similar vein, tempering guilt allows us to get more done.
Neutralizing perfectionism mitigates paralysis and procrastination.
Actively deciding not to panic and overcompensate allows us to step into a place of peace in the midst of chaos and confusion.
Ultimately, the man who is whipped (whether physically or by the words he tells himself/ lets himself believe) is left weaker, not stronger.
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