By emotionally separating ourselves from our own struggles we can gain perspective about our situation and can then make choice from a place of greater clarity.
If you find yourself coming up with excuses and reasons for why you can’t, tap into tap into your inner wisdom and resourcefulness.
Ask yourself what someone who wanted to achieve what you want to achieve would do and act accordingly.
The best way to build confidence is to act even when we are afraid.
With consistent practice, even when we don’t succeed, we learn.
We can then try different strategies to meet our goals.
In time, we grow more competent, and with competence, comes confidence.
We grow confident that we can do what it was that we were afraid of initially. We also become more confident in our ability to try new things.
- Pratibha Anand
One might assume that a person’s mood is what influences their body movements and posture. The reverse is true as well. We can activate more energized, positive, and passionate mood-states simply by changing how we move our bodies. By having our bodies act in the ways we act when we are in a different mood state, our minds follow along for the ride. By changing our physiology, we can change our psychology.
- Pratibha Anand
The words and phrases we use to describe ourselves, others, and the world around us shape our reality. Our minds believe what we continually repeat and reinforce to the point that they actively seek out ways to confirm our beliefs and ignore any evidence to the contrary.
What beliefs do you have about yourself, others, or the world that are holding you back?
What evidence that challenges these beliefs are your ignoring?
In what ways are you reinforcing these beliefs?
- Pratibha Anand
Though we rationally know that our bad habits are going to cause us long-term pain, it can be easy to give into our urges and triggers in the short-term. At the same time, we are also aware that good habits we want to adopt but aren't will give us so much more lasting pleasure than our bad habits ever could.
So why do we stay stuck in our bad habits?
Consider that human beings are primarily motivated by two things: (1) experiencing pleasure; and (2) avoiding pain.
Within this framework, pain motivates us more in the short-term.
This is why avoiding the short-term discomfort of a new, positive seems more motivating to our brains in the moment than does the pleasures of what those good habits will eventually bring us or even the medium-term sense of self-confidence and efficacy that comes with not giving into our urges.
In order to change our behavior, we must pay attention to what we focus on.
In moments when we want to give into an urge, rather than focusing on the discomfort of resisting the urge, we must feel the pain associated with giving into it. Then. we must bring to mind and feel the pleasure associated with a good habit and the sense of success and empowerment we will feel by practicing those habits instead.
- Pratibha Anand
What are you doing to not feel?
No feeling can kill you.
But not feeling can.
Feel to heal.
- Pratibha
In order to start a new habit, we must first plant the seeds.
It is not enough to simply plant the seeds. We need to ensure that they are watered regularly (through practicing the new habit) and that they are in a fertile, safe environment (cultivating positive thoughts and emotions and surrounding ourselves with positive people, places, and influences).
With time, our seeds will sprout roots and the first signs of our progress will surface and become visible.
We must be careful to not grow complacent and back down at this stage.
We must remember that our recover roots at this stage are still fragile.
Sometimes, the more progress we make, the more our old habits desperately want to pull us back.
Keep persevering. Don’t give in or give up in the face of obstacles. Trust that new habits are possible and that they are possibly for you.
- Pratibha Anand
Have patience. Have faith.
Sometimes success is simply a matter of being able to hold on just a little bit longer.
- Pratibha Anand
Even when what you do seems to make no immediate difference, remind yourself that they do matter and that each of positive action you take adds up.
- Pratibha Anand
Progress – even if it is slow progress – is still progress.
Celebrate it!
With some things, as long as we are headed in the right direction, we do not need to know all of the details. We do not need to see the entire staircase – all we need is to see the next step and to step forward.
- Pratibha Anand
We must commit ourselves to the new habit, even if we face obstacles and challenges.
We must commit ourselves to the new habit even if we feel discouraged, angry, anxious, or depressed.
We must commit ourselves to the new habit regardless of what other people say or do and regardless of the circumstances in our lives.
Ultimately, though, we must take action.
Action is proof of commitment.
- Pratibha Anand
It can be easy to feel discouraged by what we consider to be slow progress.
We may feel impatient and frustrated that we aren’t getting to our goals fast enough.
We may feel defeated and want to give up because it feels like we’ll never get to where we want to go in our lives at this rate.
During these times, we may feel tempted to sabotage or abandon our efforts.
But we must remind ourselves that slow and steady wins the race.
We must remind ourselves that houses are built brick by brick.
We must remind ourselves that the journey of a thousand miles is traveled step by step.
We must remember that any worthwhile endeavor is worth being patient with and persevering through in order to do it well and sustainably.
- Pratibha Anand
Stop punishing yourself for not following through with your goals.
Start rewarding yourself for the times you do.
The flames of motivation are kindled not by dousing yourself with penalty and penance, but by positively reinforcing the desirable and the desired.
- Pratibha Anand
Progress is not linear.
Do not throw in the towel, postpone right action, or give into your bad habits or sense of defeat simply because you had a setback.
You are never back at square 1.
Remember that 3 steps forwards and 2 steps backwards is still ahead of where you were.
If nothing else, learn from your setbacks. Seek to understand what set you back and how you can respond differently and set yourself up for success next time.
Giving up is simply an excuse our bad habits like to use.
- Pratibha Anand
Do you have a different set of standards for yourself versus everyone else?
In some areas, we may hold ourselves to unrealistically high expectations and punish ourselves harshly when we do not meet them.
Conversely, we may let ourselves off the hook when it comes to certain actions. Even if we are not proud of engaging in these behaviors and even if we expect others to not engage in them, we may rationalize our actions to ourselves or simply claim that we cannot help ourselves.
In what areas are your standards for yourself higher than the standards you have for others?
In what areas are they lower than the standards you have for others?
Are your standards different for different people in your life?
What might this mean?
- Pratibha Anand
Seek the wisdom of your future self - ideally yourself on your deathbed.
Hindsight may be 20/20 - use your future self's hindsight to your advantage in the present.
What would the person at the end of your life looking back advise you to do or not do? To say or not say? To think or not think? How would they want you to care for yourself and others? How would they advise you to spend your time? How would they counsel you to spend your life?
Rather than simply thinking about it, write it down. Doing so can be a sobering exercise, but one that can save you from a lot of remorse and disappointment in the future.
- Pratibha Anand
Do you find yourself giving into the very things you told yourself you wouldn’t do when things get challenging or the circumstances you had expected change?
o The way we overcome getting side-tracked is by COMMITMENT.
o The way we follow through on our intentions is by COMMITMENT.
o The way we achieve the goals we desire is by COMMITMENT.
o The way we build the lives we desire for ourselves is by COMMITMENT.
Decide. Commit. Follow Through. Repeat.
- Pratibha Anand
“Doing nothing” in relaxation or in recharging oneself is better than pretending to do something and depleting yourself through distraction. – Pratibha Anand
"Sometimes success is more about emphasizing the positive than it is about trying to eliminate all of the negative."
- Pratibha Anand
March 13th, 2021
"Action > Thinking/ Planning.
Creation > Consumption.
Action generates momentum.
Action generates enthusiasm."
– Pratibha Anand
March 12th, 2021
"Do not think too long on anything. Nothing is permanent or irreversible."
- Pratibha Anand
March 11th, 2021
"Make a decision, do not revisit it, and stick with it." - Pratibha Anand
