April 28th, 2017

April 28th, 2017


Affirmation: Failure is not trying.


Word of the Day: lacuna (n):

1. a gap or missing part, as in a manuscript, series, or logical argument; hiatus.

2. Anatomy. one of the numerous minute cavities in the substance of bone, supposed to contain nucleate cells.

synesthesia (n):

1. a sensation produced in one modality when a stimulus is applied to another modality, as when the hearing of a certain sound induces the visualization of a certain color.

The Sight of a Soul

One of the marvels of the world

is the sight of a soul sitting in prison

with the key in its hand.

Covered with dust,

with a cleansing waterfall an inch away.

A young man rolls from side to side,

though the bed is comfortable

and a pillow holds his head.

He has a living master, yet he wants more,

and there is more.

If a prisoner had not lived outside,

he would not detest the dungeon.

Desiring knows there is a satisfaction

beyond this. Straying maps the path.

A secret freedom opens

through a crevice you can barely see.

The awareness a wine drinker wants

cannot be tasted in wine, but that failure

brings his deep thirst closer.

_____

Your Mission Statement

To have a purpose means that we have concern for ourselves and for the world in which we live. While most people have many values and priorities that are important to them, the majority of people identify with one or two primary concerns that are constants in their lives, such as a desire to teach, the love for animals, a belief in a spiritual path, or the connection with family and close friends. Purpose doesn’t necessarily involve the desire to change the world or save it from injustice and wrongdoing. Purpose does, however, entail responsibility for ourselves and our relationships. Like a company’s mission statement, purpose expressed in the form of a central concern becomes an organizing principle in our lives.

Companies – and individuals - with clear mission statements have a concrete foundation and an effective means of evaluating their progress, path, direction, and destination. For example, if an organization’s mission statement includes a commitment to contributing to its local community, it becomes fairly easy to evaluate and see whether these contributions (whether financial or in the form of service, time, expertise, or something else) are being made. Individuals can similarly benefit from creating and referring to personal mission statements. Personal mission statements provide us with direction and a tangible way in which to assess our congruence with that direction.

The following, courtesy of psychotherapist Thom Rutledge, are examples of real mission statements (one organizational and two personal). Recognize that these statements emphasize a general direction as opposed to specific objectives. This is intentional because mission statements help us set a course for our lives and evaluate progress. In other words, a mission statement is more about “traveling east” rather than “getting to Paris.” If I realize that I am traveling south, then I can ask myself, “Am I off course or have I changed my mind about what course I plan to take?”

It's nearly impossible to create a permanent long-term set of specific outcomes, as life can change so quickly. It's great to have an overall direction in life, but it is more important that people learn how to adapt in their current situations to find the most fulfillment and happiness. Needless to say, short-term, SMART action steps are incredibly important. This is because we all have the tendency to postpone committed action, and thereby also perpetually postpone the accomplishments of our goals. Also, practice usually does make "perfect" (I use the term lightly!) over time. This, in turn, influences what psychologists know as the "confidence-competence" loop, where competence in an area feeds confidence, and confidence leads to more competence, and so on.

Having said that, I do believe that individuals and organizations can get so caught up in the details and the minutia that they miss "the forest for the trees." Stepping back and seeing the broader direction and vision in times like these is critically important. It is also specifically relevant when you consider ethics. If we take Enron, for example, I wonder how things would have turned out differently if decision-makers in that company choose to pull back and think about the company's values and the possible repercussion of their actions as opposed to getting so caught up in the short-term financial pressures.

In any case and without further ado:

1. Mission Statement from Alive Hospice, Inc. Nashville, Tennessee

Alive Hospice, Inc. will provide physical, psychological, and spiritual comfort and support to dying patients and their families, continuing during the time of bereavement, and will provide educational services and training related to life-threatening illness and grief to individuals and groups.

2. Personal Mission Statement #1

I have a primary focus on treating others well and acting in ways that encourage others to treat me with the same consideration. While taking full responsibility for my decision-making, I will pursue personal success in my career, relationships, and personal health (mentally, physically, and spiritually).

3. Personal Mission Statement #2

I am committed to living a life that is productive for myself and others. I will be clear about my personal value system and live according to those values. In addition to productivity, my levels of relaxation and joy will play a significant part in evaluating my success.

___

- Write your mission statement. Look over it each day for at least one week and make changes and revisions as you see fit until your feel truly connected to your mission.

- Then, consider writing a mission statement that would that been applicable to your life when you were being less than responsible.

- Reflect upon the differences in these statements.

April 26th, 2017

April 26th, 2017


Affirmation: I tolerate others' anger and disappointment. I maintain the relationship and my course of action.


Word of the Day: latitudinarian (adj):

1. allowing or characterized by latitude in opinion or conduct, especially in religious views.

2. a person who is latitudinarian in opinion or conduct.

green-collar (adj):

1. noting or pertaining to workers, jobs, or businesses that are involved in protecting the environment or solving environmental problems.

How You Are With Me

God spoke to Moses,

You are the one I have chosen,

and I love you.

Moses replies, I feel the generosity,

but say what it is in me

that causes your love.

God explains, You have seen

a little child with its mother.

It does not know anyone else exists.

The mother praises or scolds,

a little slap perhaps,

but still the child reaches

to be held by her.

Disappointment, elation,

there is only one direction

that the child turns.

That is how

you are with me.

_____

Lagom – The Newest Wellness Trend?

If you follow health trends, you have no doubt experienced the “hygge” fever that spread like wildfire through the wellness world this past winter.  Hygge (pronounced hue-guh, not hoo-gah), for those who are unfamiliar, is a Danish word used when acknowledging a feeling or moment, whether alone or with friends, at home or out, ordinary or extraordinary as cozy, charming, or special.

According to Hyggehouse.com, “Hygge (or to be “hyggeligt”) doesn’t require learning “how to hygge”, adopting it as a lifestyle or buying anything. It simply requires being present and recognizing a moment that feels so sweet, cozy, charming, special or nice that you just have to name the moment.”

In the United States, hygge has come to describe “the warm and fuzzy satisfaction of going the extra mile to feel cozy.” Hygge can be experienced in a plethora of different ways. It can be nestling in front of a crackling fire with a cup of hot cocoa in an oversized mug.  It can be cuddling up in a large-knit cashmere throw with a favorite book. It can be playing with and laughing and tickling a family member or friend. Ultimately, then, hygge ranks comfort and ease above all else.

Because of this, you might believe that “lagom” – a Swedish term that means “not too little, not too much” or “just the right amount”, is just another Scandinavian trend that is essentially another word for or form of hygge. However, I am here to tell you that this is not the case. (But you can rest easy – hygge fever isn’t going anywhere, either!).

Lagom – which, according to Google, has been searched for more in 2017 than in any other year already – is already the topic of several books due to be published this fall and is also the cornerstone of Swedish furniture and home décor brand IKEA’s new cost-conscious sustainability philosophy. At its core, the very essence of lagom is somewhat of an antipode to the concept of hygge. After all, lagom finds its roots in the more austere traditions of the Lutheran faith and describes a form of moderation that emphasizes discipline and restraint over comfort and ease.

The preeminent example for lagom used in popular press is that of milk preferences in Sweden. Apparently, Swedes opt for 1.5 percent milk for the most part – they strike the balance between creamy, whole milk and milk that is entirely free of fat. In simplistic terms, then, if hygge is about the extra touch, lagom is about the basics and the essentials.

Lagom philosophy extends far beyond dairy products, of course, and extends into areas including politics, personality, and even creative expression. Lagom has a largely positive connotation, but even a Swede was quick to point out that “it’s inherently limiting.” One blogger was quick to point out that when applied to wellness and health, lagom would call for, “Nothing too intense or extreme, of course, so say goodbye to boot camp, marathons, #yogaeverydamnday, and your plant-based lifestyle. But on the flip side, it means 35-hour work-weeks, more vacation days, and more time spent with friends and family.”

In my opinion, moderation is not a bad thing. In fact, I believe that our society can stand to gain a lot from lagom thinking, what with our multitasking, over-scheduled, overbook, overwhelmed, stressed out, caffeinated, burnt out, sleep-deprived, media-saturated lives. When I think of lagom in terms of its religious roots, I view it as describing the balance and equanimity that people from many different spiritual traditions strive for. Maybe lagom is just a word that can remind us that when things get shaky in life and we are trying to get our balance, we need to fall back on what we know to be true and follow the principals that help us to live the life we desire

To end on a rather meta note, I propose that we take a lagom approach to lagom. Let us at once heed Epictetus’ view that “If one oversteps the bounds of moderation, the greatest pleasures cease to please” while also remembering W. Somerset Maugham’s musing that “Excess on occasion is exhilarating [because] it prevents moderation from acquiring the deadening effect of a habit.”

After all, everything in moderation… including moderation itself!

- Had you heard about lagom previous? What about hygge? What are your thoughts on each?

- How do you or would you like to practice hygge in your life?

- How do you or would you like to practice lagom in your life?

- How can you cultivate balance and efficacy in your life while also finding opportunities for daily joy and authentic self-expression?