A Three To One Ratio

December 18th, 2018


A Three To One Ratio

"Don't get stuck looking at the finger pointing towards the moon. Look at the moon." - Zen Saying

Oftentimes, we find ourselves stuck in the finger-pointing blame game.

The next time you find yourself in this situation, pause and take the time to actually act out what you are doing. That is to say, actually point your finger. It might look something like this:


While the other person (or thing or situation) might be partially responsible, don't forget that for the one finger you are pointing outwards, there are three fingers pointing back at you.

Blaming and shaming are not helpful.

But sometimes owning our responsibility is.

Even if that responsibility is simply about finding a way to accept, forgive, and move forward.

Why There's No Such Thing As A Defining Characteristic

December 11th, 2018


Why There's No Such Thing As A Defining Characteristic


A symphony isn't illustrated by a solitary note.

A novel isn't represented by a single page.

An ocean isn't defined by an individual drop of water.

A beach isn't circumscribed by a grain of sand.

So, too, does no mistake define who you are.

And it is often the off-key, unexpected events in our lives that give them beauty - and give us humility, humanity, resilience, courage, and gratitude.

Keep moving forward.

Past The Past

December 4th, 2018


Past The Past

The past is in your head.

The present is in your hands.

And what you do in the present (the way you think, feel, speak, act, show up) has the ability to shape the pasts you look back on in the future.

If you have regrets about past, remember that what you do in the present is the vehicle to get you to a different future - a future that will one day become a past that you can look back upon not with regret, but with joy and gratitude.

Do you doubt yourself and your ability to make and sustain the required changes? Remember that confidence is built not by thinking, but by doing.

You cannot relive the past.

You cannot pre-live the future.

But you can live NOW.

"The past doesn’t exist except as a memory, a mental story, and though past events aren’t changeable, your stories about them are. You can act now to transform the way you tell the story of your past, ultimately making it a stalwart protector of your future." - Martha Beck