March 23rd, 2017

March 23rd, 2017


Affirmation: I am getting better and better every day.


Word of the Day: Throttlebottom (n):
1. sometimes lowercase. a harmless incompetent in public office.

The Sun Is Love

The sun is love. The lover,
a speck circling the sun.

A spring wind moves to dance
any branch that isn't dead.

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Priorities

I first heard the following story over a decade ago. In one of memory's inexplicable workings, the story resurfaced in my brain as I have been thinking a lot about my values, priorities, and life goals recently. It is a powerful story that I would like to share with you:

A professor of philosophy stood before his class with some items in front of him. When the class began, wordlessly he picked up a large empty glass jar and proceeded to fill it with rocks about two inches in diameter. He then asked the students if the jar was full.

They agreed that it was full.

The professor then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly and watched as the pebbles rolled into the open areas between the rocks. The professor then asked the students again if the jar was full.

They chuckled and agreed that it was indeed full this time.

The professor proceeded to pick up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. The sand filled the remaining open areas of the jar. “Now,” said the professor, “I want you to recognize that this jar signifies your life. The rocks are the truly important things, such as family, health and relationships. If all else was lost and only the rocks remained, your life would still be meaningful. The pebbles are the other things that matter in your life, such as work or school. The sand signifies the remaining “small stuff” and material possessions.

If you put sand into the jar first, there is no room for the rocks or the pebbles. The same can be applied to your lives. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff, you will never have room for the things that are truly important.

Pay attention to the things in life that are critical to your happiness and well-being. Take time to get medical check-ups, play with your children, go for a run, write your grandmother a letter. There will always be time to go to work, clean the house, or fix the disposal. Take care of the rocks first – things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest is just pebbles and sand.

___

This story makes several important points that are applicable to all of our lives to varying degrees. If we focus our attention and energies on the big goals of our lives, then the smaller things will move around to fill the space left over. However, the reverse is not true. If we start with the sand, there won’t be any space left for pebbles or rocks. When it comes down to it, we all have the same twenty-four hours in a day. Time is the great equalizer. So we must be mindful and focused on how we spend hour hours if we want to realize our dreams.

Though it may seem obvious to focus on the important stuff, most of us don’t in practice. It is much too easy to idle away the sands of time on Facebook, YouTube, or in front of the TV. Likewise, it is easy to focus too much on ‘busy work’ that is ultimately unimportant under the guise of productivity. Doing this essentially buries us under a mountain of pebbles. In comparison, the rocks are heavy and thus take time, strength and discipline to budge.

Thus we must remember is that it is most important to first include and address the lager rocks in our lives, because if we don’t do so, we are likely to miss out on our real priorities altogether.  If we give priority to the smaller things in life (the pebbles and the sand), our lives will be filled up with less important things, leaving little or no room or time for the things in our lives that are most meaningful to us. 

This is why, it is worth really slowing down and taking the time to reflect and ask yourself,

What are the large stones in my life?

Once you’ve identified them, take care of the large stones first – these are the things that REALLY matter. Set your priorities. The rest are just pebbles and sand. If you put the sand or the pebbles into the jar first, there will be no room left for the rocks. Be the captain of the ship of your life rather than letting the pebbles and sand dictate its course.

I encourage you to take a moment and ask yourself,

Is my jar of life full of sand and pebbles or is it filled with large stones?

What are my top 5-7 rocks?

What are my main pebbles?

What is the sand in my life? Does my sand have a ‘quicksand’ quality in that I get stuck in it?

What is preventing me from prioritizing my rocks at this time? How might I address this?

What is the smallest step I can take today towards working on and aligning myself with my rocks?

PS If you’re unsure where to being, try the following exercise:

1. Identify what your personal rocks are. What goals do you dream about having completed? What experiences, people, and things do you want to fill your life with? What would make you the most proud? This is the time to dream big. Remember, this is for you and about you. Don’t worry about what others would think or their expectations. Likewise, leave your fears and judgments out of the values identification process as well.

2. Choose one or a few of rocks and set all the others aside. If you divide your attention over too many projects you will end up spreading yourself too thin, making little progress on any of them, and becoming discouraged and demotivated. You can switch rocks later, but at any given point in time, only commit to a few of them fully, wholeheartedly, and with focus.

3. Next, identify your pebbles. These are the “smaller, lighter, quicker goals and projects that you could complete in a few days of work.” If you would like, you may also take a moment and reflect on the sand you use to fill in the cracks in your time. Try not to spend too much thought on your sand other than to understand how and why it takes up more time in your life that you want to spend on it.